I Was Born With Whiskers. So I'll Tell You How To Use The Best Beard Wax UK

Been Usin' Beard Wax Since I Was Soilin' My Nappies

You and me? We like to take care of our appearance, right? I, Bristles, have had a beard longer than you've been alive, so have a listen to what I'm gonna tell ya about the best beard wax for your face bush.

As I mentioned in some of my other blogish tales, I been usin' beard wax since I was born with a full beard and plush chest hair to match me mum's. When you'd see us together shirtless roastin' pigeons on the banks of the River Thames, everyone would always say, "That's his mother's son."

LEARN THE TRUE RESTORATIVE PROPERTIES OF BEARD WAX MY SON

I’ve always known the specialness of my beard and have been careful to take particularly good care of it. Since mine’s long and thick like a woolly mammoth, I like to go with beard wax which has a much stronger consistency than oils or balms. Plus it’s smashin’ when it comes to styling. It has essential oils at its base and beeswax which provides a superior and stronger hold that’s the bee's knees for men blessed with long beards. 

The wax will also condition and moisturize your craggy mug and mane and its fragrant scent will mask your pungent bovine odor. Much more conducive to attractin’ females, or males, or old people or whatever you desire.

WANT TO KNOW HOW MUCH BEARD WAX TO USE? DEPENDS, HOW LONG ARE YOU?

Application is a cinch. 

• If ya measure four inches, take a thumb-nail sized amount of the wax, or if you’re packin’ more than 4 inches go with a thumbnail and a half.
• Rub it into your hands then scrub it into the roots of your beard hair under the chin goin’ up and out from there. 
• After you spread it evenly throughout your hair you can begin to style it however you please. And rest assured it’s gonna hold throughout the day. That’s a fact. 
• If your beard ever gets ruffled, you can rest assured that you’ll easily be able to restyle it with the Mobsters Beard Grooming Brush, Folding Comb or even your fingers, though we don't recommend it. But if you do use your fingers, just make sure you know where they been.

So’s if you’re wonderin’ why people pay more attention to my beard than the news, it’s ‘cause I been stylin’ with the best beard wax since you were just a twinkle in your mother’s mind.